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I met him sometime in December 2014 a few days to the completion of my Industrial attachment, we got close and before I knew it, our relationship became official. He was there for me during my trying period when dad was really sick, he would come to the hospital every evening after work to spend time with me.The new year came, I was back to school to face the last lap just then, the blow of my dad’s death hit me. It was really bad but he was not there to console me. Not even with words talk less of being present at the burial ceremony.
Meanwhile, I am in my twenties and I had to face reality with everything around. I was really angry at him and couldn’t bring myself to forgive him. We had countless dialogue that ended on a bad note and this was aggravated by my core choleric nature. Despite this, we tried to be good.
Last year November, I got back, we met and straightened up everything. But here is the issue, he started ringing the whole marriage bell in my ears. I tried several times to explain and convince him that I’m not ready (because I feel I haven’t even discovered myself and I have a few things I intend doing before marriage he says why will a girl who’s through with school refuse marriage). As much as I know he isn’t ready but he wants to get married due to the pressure from his parents (he is the first-born) and his friends (they say they must marry in 2016).
The issue became serious that he gave me one week to think about it so I could meet his parents. He told me his parents intend to get him a wife if he refuses to get one. I laughed thinking it was a joke. Just after I gave him myself for the first time, it all happened and they found him a lady.He opened up to me to still have a rethink so that he could stop the process. He also explained that both parents have commenced plans. I am so confused… does arranged marriage still exist?
The arranged bride is well educated, a boss of her own and even has a boyfriend. Yet, she is being forced by her parents. I’m I being selfish and over ambitious ? should I settle down with him because I really love him? I’m hurt but deep down I feel am doing the right thing because I know marriage is not a child’s play.
Please help am confused.